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Tuesday, August 04, 2009


I haven’t dreamed with any regularity since I was a pre-teen. It’s weird, I know, but that’s the way it is. I heard you go insane if you don’t dream, so in my vanity I assume I do dream but I just don’t remember them.

A couple weeks ago, the dreams returned.

I dream now, every night, and I have to admit that it’s rather disconcerting. Not because they’re nightmares, but because the dream state is so unfamiliar to me. I don’t like it. I don’t like it at all.

This most definitely is a side effect of the success of my meditating. I’m sure it’s good for me, probably the most concrete evidence that the meditation is “working”, but still, I find it unsettling.

I know I’ll get used to it, but in the meantime I’ll just have to deal with that moment of wooziness as I exit one world and enter another.

Meditation also promises insight and enhanced creativity among other things. Those are more to my liking!


Sidney said...

In the weird serendipity category, I just read a line in a Raymond Carver story about how you could go crazy without dreaming. Strange timing.

I have had some dreams I've remembered lately. I think that a lot of it is that you don't remember dreams very long and the ones that prove memorable are the vivid, disturbing ones.

I just had a warped version of reality in which I had responsibilities I hadn't fulfilled, but it's harrowing when it happens in a dream.

Clifford said...

Yeah, that is strange...I've always wanted to read Carver...maybe this is the year?

I don't know about your theory though, because my dreams are rarely eventful. Even when I was a kid, and dreamed a lot, my dreams were only disturbing in that they were so normal, I remembered them as actual occurrences rather than dreams. I still remember the afternoon I tore apart my room looking for the latest issue of The Amazing Spiderman, only to realize, hours later, that I must have dreamt it.

Maybe I am insane (:

Lauren said...

I don't dream much either. I went though a small phase where I had a nightmare about someone breaking in every night for about four nights so now we sleep with the cell phone downstairs in our bedroom and it's better. Is there anything that you are dreaming about? Maybe your subconscious is trying to tell you something? I hope that you are either adjust to the dreams or they go away quickly.

Clifford said...


Sorry ot hear about your dreams. Mine are pretty content-neutral -- nothing of much import goes on. No real nightmares. In fact, even as a kid, they were rarely nightmares.

I'm unemployed right now and under a lot of financial stress, so that could have triggered it, but the meditation seems to have reduced the impact of the stress significantly...so much that I'm constantly amazed by how well I'm actually doing. So no, I don't think the content is the issue as I seem to forget it right away after waking up.

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This is me and one of my two cats. His name is Cougar, and he’s an F1 Chausie. A chausie is a new breed of cat under development. Chausies are the result of a cross between a domestic cat (in Cougar’s case, a Bengal) and a jungle cat (Felis Chaus). Cougar’s mom is 8 pounds and his father is a 30-pound jungle cat. He’s about 16 pounds, super intelligent, spirited, and toilet trained. A writer without a cat (or two) is not to be trusted.